Quite coincidentally and with no specific agenda, I return to the theme of vampires today to ask the eternal question: why are they always laughing at us?
Why do vampires have to act so big all the time, as if their whole raison un-d'être is to make us feel inferior and silly? Is it because they're eternal? That seems a flimsy excuse. Most of us humans can expect to live considerably longer than a gold fish but we don't bust out laughing every time we pass an aquarium, do we?
It must be something else because vampires really do make a point of laughing in our faces. It can't be that blood is an intoxicant because they usually do this before they attack. I suppose anticipation might have something to do with it but as much as I enjoy a chilly Stella Artois, I've never dissolved into fits of giggles before drinking one.
Maybe it's a detachment thing. Maybe for vampires the old saw that "comedy equals pain plus time" has a more immediate currency, given that time is meaningless to them. Maybe it's like the way we humans tend to laugh inappropriately at the movies when something bad happens to someone, because it's not happening to us, because it's a movie, it isn't real.
Maybe we're not real to vampires. Maybe to them we're the movie.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Why do vampires laugh at us?
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8 Arbogasps:
Goddamn Belgian ales are good aren't they?
Anyway, I have a friend who's a werewolf and he says vampires are just assholes.
"Stella Artois" is a lager, isn't it?
Anyway, I prefer to think that vampires see themselves in us ... we're like looking in a mirror for them. After all, they can't see their own reflection in a mirror ... or is that werewolves? I get confused ...
Anyway, they see themselves in us, and the silly futility of their vampiric existence ...
Technically, Rick, Stella is a lager, a so-called table beer.
Hey, waaaiiit a minute... Rick Olson ... Richard Olson ... could you be the artist of the infamous jug-u-lar Countess Zaleska?
Perhaps it is because they are just plain evil and this ties in with anticipation...
You like a stella, you anticipate it, but you don't feel like you are hunting and destroying it... it is just a beverage...
Vampies might enjoy the anticipation so much, being evil and knowing what they are going to destroy, that they burst into spontaneous maniacal laughter...
Or perhaps its because the silly victim has forgotten their afliction of OCD and not scattered grain in front of them (for counting purposes)
Oh well, food for thought (or beverage for thought-numbing)
Now I'm thirsty.
Or because they're just assholes. Trust me on this one.
And when I'm sucking back a Blue Moon or DT or Stella that someone else paid for I really don't care if it's a lager or an ale or lagerale. I just knows me it taste some kind a good. Just like I know vampires are assholes.
Jeez, Jonathan, I detect a certain amount of anger in your voice. What did vampires ever do to you?
Sorry, Arbo ... I'm not that Richard Olson, just a humble film fan and sometime blogger.
And I'd like a cold Stella about now, meself.
I'm not that Richard Olson
Damn. I really wanted to see the bottom half of that painting!
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